"Arlington Fire Chief Edward P. Plaugher thought one of his subordinates, Battalion Chief Jerome Dale Smith, was sometimes late in responding to service calls. So he turned to the police department for help. The police department had this idea: Put a tracking device on Smith's county-issued Chevy Suburban for four days. The surveillance showed that Smith was at home during much of his shift."

"MINISTERS are to allow insurance companies to use genetic testing to assess a person's risk of inheriting serious illness. People with a genetic tendency to chronic conditions will face significantly higher premiums for medical, life and travel insurance."

20/3/00 - A guide to Euromyths, such as:

"Statement: Under new EC regulations, Christmas trees must be symmetrical in shape, with regularly spaced needles, identical roots and be the same colour.

Response: There are absolutely no EC regulations concerning Christmas trees, nor are there to be in the future. However an independent organisation, The Christmas Tree Growers Association of Western Europe, has drawn up its "European specifications for Christmas Trees" with a view to improving the quality of their product and making their marketing within the EC all the easier. This initiative has come primarily from its French and Danish members."

19/3/00 - Yesterday's Time Machine playlist.

18/3/00 - A great poem:  (via email)

 "Flames

 Smokey the Bear heads
 into the autumn woods
 with a red can of gasoline
 and a box of wooden matches.

 His ranger's hat is cocked
 at a disturbing angle.

 His brown fur gleams
 under the high sun
 as his paws, the size
 of catcher's mitts,
 crackle into the distance.

 He is sick of dispensing
 warnings to the careless,
 the half-wit camper,
 the dumbbell hiker.

 He is going to show them
 how a professional does it.

 --Billy Collins"

"Equations do not come much simpler: n = p1 + p2. But knock off a quick proof of this one's eternal truth and you could become a dollar millionaire and earn yourself a place in number history. All you have to prove is that any even number (n) greater than two is the sum of two prime numbers (p1 and p2)."

"A city store has been asked to tone down a risqué window display featuring teddy bears with outsized manhoods."

"In Mr Benn, the suited cartoon character left 52 Festive Road and wandered into a costume shop - he never went to work.  The shopkeeper would invite him to try on an outfit he had never tried before, and after stepping through "the other door" into the supposed changing room, Mr Benn would escape the mundanity of everyday life and have an adventure.  After learning a moral lesson, the shopkeeper would bring the adventure to an end and Mr Benn would return to reality."

And there is a deconstruction of Mr. Benn, including The Religious Theory, The Political Theory and:

The Freudian Theory

The shopkeeper's little round glasses are very reminiscent of old Sigmund Freud, and could encourage us to seek a psychological message secreted within each episode. The dressing room where Mr Benn changes has a dark red interior, and is therefore clearly a symbolic womb, through which Mr Benn is repeatedly 're-born' into other possible lives. Mr Benn therefore manages to repeatedly live out the fantasy of regression to the mother's womb through the mediation of the surrogate father figure (the Shopkeeper). Or something like that."

Also visit the Official Mr. Benn page.

17/3/00 - Here is the website for the April 16th protests against the IMF and World Bank.

17/3/00 - Great name for a weblog:  Another Singing Pig.

17/3/00 - Making maths a bit more interesting:  (via email)

"1) Dennis the Menace is playing with his sling shot in his backyard. If he fires a pebble with a horizontal velocity of 20 m/s at an angle of 15 degrees will it hit Mr. Wilson in the head while he works in his garden 15 meters away? If not, how far away does it land?"

17/3/00 - 101 things you never knew about Ken.

16/3/00 - If you ever buy a book based on the title alone it has to be this:  (via email)

"Blood-Lust Chickens and Renegade Sheep : A First Timer's Guide to Country Living"

"Drink whenever the oscillating spindle sander is used.
Drink if Norm mentions his compound mitre saw. 
Drink if Norm's shirt isn't plaid."

16/3/00 - The Guardian takes it upon itself to expand its readers knowledge:

"Here in rural Suffolk near Newmarket, "barebacking" means riding a horse without a saddle, and only garage mechanics have a wrench sticking out of their jeans. How surprised we were.
Dr Duncan Hannant
Bury St Edmunds, Suffolk"

16/3/00 - Sometimes you have just have to steal the whole thing.  (via memepool)

"The comforting thing about being a Doctor Who fan is that there's always another one who's sadder or has way too much time on their hands."

"ARE YOU sorted when it comes to keeping up with teenagers?  Maybes you is part of the bangin' crowd that knows the jive when they try sounding you out for mucho moolah?  Or is you just pants?"

"Robbie Williams has long been feted by teenagers, but yesterday it emerged he is also the first choice of those at the other end of this mortal coil; his song Angels has been voted the tune most people would like played at their funeral."

"POLICE who shot dead an escaped circus tiger in Warsaw also hit and killed a vet who was trying to tranquillise it."

14/3/00 - Is your cat keeping you awake with its miaowing?  Then you need Robokoneko!  (via NewsTrolls)

14/3/00 - More on the Great Nutrition Debate.  Not science's finest hour:

"These educated men of science offloaded much silliness during their three hours together. Bethea said that carrots were too fattening. Sears called food ''the most powerful drug anyone will ever encounter.'' The assembled cynical hucksters - Ornish noted that his dieters enjoy better sex - felt comfortable denouncing Atkins as a cynical huckster."

14/3/00 - The most pressing issue in Britain today: 'Is there a conspiracy against beardies?'  (via linkmachinego)

14/3/00 - You weigh up the issues.  You look at the personalities.  You conclude: Bush is a Wanker.

An interview with Tom Tomorrow:

14/3/00 - The Blog Map has been slightly updated but still only two shown in Florida.  I know there is at least one more , Baylink, based in Tampa Bay.

14/3/00 - Yay!  I get a mention in Weblog Nation.